Desperate Times

This economy is doing a number on a lot of people. At this point, I'm just somewhat happy that I can fill up my car for under $50, damn speculators.

I guess it's bad on a jetsetting level too, the White Cockatoo resort in Australia has a nude "anything goes party." Well, at least it's free publicity...

In some sporting news, a 16-year-old Japanese girl got drafted to play pro baseball. 

First Martha Stewart, then Wesley Snipes, now Mark Cuban? The SEC is trying to catch up Cuban for some insider trading. I wonder how much tax money it costs us to put a case like this together, probably too much.

Kurt Warner for MVP.

Say hi to your mother for me

Since the only people that I update more often than are Janson and Kanyon, this happened a few weeks ago. Marky Mark was on Jimmy Kimmel Live! trying to hype Max Payne (it's MAYBE worth a rental) and he commented on Andy Samberg's SNL impression of him.

Apparently he wasn't too happy about it and he spoke on it.

This happened the Saturday after...

Dan thinks it's hilarious.

So keep your love locked down

In case anybody missed it on The Ellen DeGeneres Show, and missed it once again when the good people from let's talk about it posted, Kanye West performed Love Lockdown on The Ellen Show last week, and for the fans, the 808s and Heartbreak album is supposed to be due sometime between November 25th and December 16th. 

Song is dope even though I had no idea what the hell it was first time E put me on. And if anyone is sleeping on The Ellen Show, it's the funniest non-cable show (I can't speak for the folks with cable) on daytime, no homo.

This is some Kanye stuff that DeWitz posted, it's dope, click to enlarge. 

Speaking of SNL and Kanye though...

come on everybody let's make cocaine cool

SNL used to be one of the funnier network shows out, but lately (past 4-5 years?) it seems like the show has completely fallen off. You all remember it, "Live from New York, it's Saturday Night!" That opener used to ilicit expectations of laughter but now, most of the skits are mediocre and unfunny. It seems like the only thing keeping SNL afloat to Joe Public is Tina Fey's impression of Sarah Palin.

In case you missed it:

Most people have said they like the Fey/Palin bit but I think the funniest part is Jason Sudeikis' (Conan interview) impersonation of Joe Biden.

Other than these skits, which SNL has already started to beat to death, the only things worth watching are the musical acts (they've had some pretty dope people on as of late), some of the digital shorts, and MAYBE Weekend Update. I'm not sold on WU 'cause I'm not sure if it's actually funny, or if it's like the girl that's hot because she hangs out with ugly girls. Is WU funny or are the other skits that bad?

This is my favorite digital short by far, Andy Samberg's spoof on the Iranian President, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. Adam Levine with the children's choir is classic.

A Boldin-less Cardinals squad beat the Cowboys to go 4-2 heading into the bye week. Let's get it.

Love me some spinach dip, I'm addicted to Houston's

US market is nuts right now, US government is giving out aid like I give to ASU Parking (that's a different topic altogether). Merill Lynch was bought out by Bank of America, Lehman Brothers fell under, JPMorgan Chase picked up Washington Mutual (Janson, give it 6 months and you can use Chase in Murderville, are you a Dodgers fan now?), US government approved $25 extralarge for the auto industry. In some local AZ news, Bill Heard filed Chapter 11, and nothing new, my wallet is still super-hungry and yet, extra-bulimic (my shoe game has benefited as of late though so it is a worthy cause).

I'll update sometime with my experience at the Food Show, yes FOOD show. One word: EPIC.

"We need a miracle,

And I say a miracle 'cause this shit is hysterical,

By my nephews and nieces, I will email Jesus,

Tell him forward to Moses and CC Allah"

Does Work

What really needs to be said? Don Gorske of Wisconsin might as well be clocking in at McDonald's. He's gone through  23,000 Big Macs in his life and has only missed a Big Mac 8 days. I don't think I'm even in the double digits. I know what you're thinking but apparently, dude is not even obese, 6'2" 185 (haha he's like a more muscular version of you Doo Doo). Put it another way, Mr. Gorske has probably spent over $25k on Big Macs alone...

But on to bigger and better things. Check it out, Kurt Warner aka The Truth aka White Jesus. Don't let the goofy Robocop/Terminator look with the oven mitts fool you, that's just to mess with other teams. Please believe dude's passing game is super buttery, just ask his fantasy football owners and Anquan Boldin (speaking of whom, Bidwell family, please give dude his money, he's gorilla pimpin' on the field). 

Don't sleep on the Cardinals, 2-0 isn't much but it's a start. What up Mike, what up Easton, we been tryin' to tell folks.

Let's get it Sun Devils. The line for the game is only -7 GA for the betting folks out there. I would've thought they'd be spotting more so that's not a bad outlook at all for A State. #2 in the Pac-10 is ripe for the picking right now.

And Happy Belated to Brett "The Big Hurt" Lynch, hit the big veintiuno last night, sorry I didn't make it out big fella.

Kids Say The Darndest Things

Kid looks like a young Doc Dre. Been pimpin' since his daddy was pimpin'.

And now for the story. My buddy helped out at the coffee shop over the Summer and one day some kids came in for some smoothies.

One of the kids gets his smoothie and tosses about a dollar into the tips cup.
Kid #2: Why’d you do that?
Kid #1: Oh, I gave him a tip.
#2: What’s a tip?
#1: It’s something you give poor people.

Wow. I'm not sure if it's funny or sad.